I’ve just finished watching the The Tyra Show on SBN. And as always, the topic kinda tickled my interest. I have been watching the Tyra Show for years now and I really find each and every topic interesting. It basically talks about anything under the sun. Fashion. Self-improvement. Relationship. Love. And other life situations. Today’s eposide is not much different. It tackled this one intriguing topic… CHEATING. Very interesting huh?!
So why did this episode got me glued on the boob tube? Did I get cheated in the past? Or I was the cheat? I’m neither telling you the answer nor confirming anything. (Hah! Very showbiz statement eh! :-))
Well, the episode just tackled the basic ways to recover from cheating. Too bad, it did not cover the most important part. The root of it all. The mother question of all questions… WHY DOES A LOVER CHEAT? Oh well, I guess that can be discussed in a separate eposide.
Anyhow, according to the show, here are the top 4 ways to recover from cheating:
- Deny It. Most people undergo this lame stage. And most of them tend to use this tactic to pretend that nothing is wrong with the relationship. Of course, we all want to save our relationship, don’t we? So the persons being cheated on have the tendency to the tell their all-knowing friends that that full-knowledge-about-the-philandering-BF/GF isn’t true at all and that the current beau is a completely trustworthy person. But deep down inside, their hearts are breaking big time… and think that denial is the best thing to do to safe the relationship. (Hah, some martyr tactic! Not for me!)
- Forgive him/her. This is actually 2 notches level after the "Deny It" stage. Of course, one has to surpass the "Know It" or "Accept It" stage before getting into the "Forgive Him/Her" stage. Ah yes, you read it right. There’s a "her" option. Cheating nowadays is not an exclusive man-thing. LOL! Forgiveness is such a hard thing to give. By forgiving a person means you are actually accepting the fact that the bastard really hurt you big time. However, forgiveness doesn’t constitute that a person can then forget whatever hurtful things his/her lover did to her/him. The trust has already been broken. So stop believing in the cliche "Forgive and Forget". Sa pelikula lang yan nina Gabby at Sharon kumita!
- Get revenge. This one is a bit liberating. There were guests in the show who claimed that upon learning that hey-your-BF/GF-has-cheated-on-you incident, they planned get even. And guess what they did? They slept with their beau’s friend! Ooohhh, some revenge there, eh! I’m not so sure if this "revenge" thing is prevalent here in Pinas. I hear some stories though. But according to the guest themselves, revenge in that weird kind of way just gave some temporary satistfaction… that is, simply to get even! Hey, don’t give some naughty meaning on that satisfaction thing huh?! According to them, they knew it wasn’t a good thing, but it definitely is a sweet revenge. (Ooooppss, I’m not promoting this one huh?!)
- Leave him/her. Oh well, do I really have to explain this one further? It’s obvious that this is the final verge. If after the cheating instance and couples could no longer bare to be with each other, then the answer is simple… LEAVE! Life shouldn’t be that though. If one can no longer live with a cheating person, then it’s time to move on. This, however, is only applicable to BF-GF relationship. I know for a fact that it is much harder for married couples to arrive at a decision like this as there are a lot more factors that need to be considered. And the most important of them are the kids. Tapos sunod na ang mga ari-arian! Aaaarrgghh, such complicated things to settle!
So, that was the Tyra Show’s episode in a nutshell.
Which is applicable to me then? I guess, I would stick with items 2 and
3 4. I’d rather forgive (but doesn’t necessarily mean I will forget huh?) and leave. Trust is an important thing for me.
Oh well, I’m still bugged by this question, "Why does a lover cheat?" Do you know some answers?